Tired after a long day…
Have you ever thought your body might be tired because you’ve been criticising and judging it all day…
One thing I love to say to my clients to explain the impact of our inner-critic is…
Would you say those words to your mother? to your best friend? Your sister?
NO?! Then why the hell are you speaking to YOURSELF that way?
On average, you are awake for approx. 15 hours per day, within this time you apparently can think up to 50,000 THOUGHTS! That is one thought every second! Even though it may seem crazy when you see the number, I’m sure, like me, you have one very busy mind too…
So this mental dialogue you have going on inside your head, just goes on and on and on and on… it never stops, all day long…
Have you ever stopped to think how much of it is actually true? What is important? What is fear?
One thing on my own mental health journey that I have come to realise is, I am not my thoughts.
Yes, you are the one that hears it, you are the one that understands, however you are merely a witness to this voice. Although this voice sounds like you, that voice is actually just your thoughts structured in language that only sounds like the voice you speak in. When you realize that you are not your thoughts or emotions you get to witness everything that is going on from a detached perspective instead of identifying with them.
Most ancient wisdom traditions throughout the ages go to great lengths to describe this witnessing experience. You’ll be fascinated to know that they all pretty much arrive at the same conclusion. The witness is who you truly are. It’s described as a state of ‘Being’ that is always present, just beneath your thoughts.
The qualities of Being are:
- And the unending capability to witness and respond to life’s challenges and demands.
Throughout the ages, all the great masters who have realised the full potential of their minds, have warned that if we ignore Being, we will become trapped in the cage of our thinking mind and disconnected from who we truly are. They describe this experience as the cause of all suffering and illness.
So lets take a step back because this is getting deep!
Now we understand that we are not our thoughts, let’s try to interrupt them before we have the feeling they control us.
The next time you run into a negative, upsetting thought or emotion, remember that it does not define or control you. You can actively choose whether to participate in it or not. Now, this may seem easier said than done. However, I can assure you from my experience it is possible.
All thoughts and feelings are like clouds in the sky. They arrive, float around for a while and then dissipate. It’s up to you to choose if you want to get entangled in them or let them go. AKA, will you encourage the storm or simply acknowledge it is here and let it go…?
1. Get outside/ Grounding
For me, simply breathing the fresh air, touching the grass can be enough to distract me. This method is called grounding. Connecting to the earth allows your body to ‘recharge’ from nature, it can stimulate a positive reaction by boosting your immune system and relaxing your nervous system. Along with this it also forces your brain to focus on something other than thoughts, something physical.
2. Change your language
If you keep on telling yourself “I can’t” then you might start believing that this its true. Try to change the language, FLIP IT!
I’m exhausted → I need to rest
I forgot → I’ll make sure to set a reminder
Constructive criticism → Feedback
Don’t … → I like it when.
Also try to avoid words such as “hopefully” or “maybe” or “one day,” because when you use those words you are really saying, “I’d like to, but I can’t.”
3. Begin and end your day with a positive thought
Before you go to sleep, thank yourself, thank your body, for a great day! Be grateful and proud for everything you achieved. When you wake up, make your first words positive “I feel absolutely fantastic, and I know today is a successful day for me.” Even if at first you don’t think you feel this way… CHANGE IT! FLIP IT!
4. When something or someone knocks you down
Whenever something irritates or depresses you during the day, take a deep breath and silently pump yourself back up with an encouraging statement filled with lots of adjectives and adverbs. Try, “I feel absolutely, amazing, strong and healthy!” Notice how your energy level changes. It really does work!
Using words to generate positive thoughts and emotions is something you can begin right now and change your life. It requires no monetary investment, no time, and only a little effort. From this moment on, before you speak, take a little breath, smile, pause…and then map out your better thoughts in stronger words. Just try it for a day and see how differently things work out for you.
Some of these steps might sound quite woo woo or not solid, BUT if you give even one a chance today, I promise you it will positively impact your day.
How do you keep your thoughts positive? Can you detach yourself from your thoughts? I would love to know your experience and way you tackle with them ? Comment below or send me a message 🙂